Comments, anyone?

On By Mick CanningIn Fiction, humour, Short story, Treatment of Women

This was a writing exercise I did some while back. The premise was to find a couple of unrelated articles or adverts in a magazine or newspaper, and make up a piece of fiction from them.

I found an article about women delaying having children due to career choices, sitting serendipitously next to a piece about child brides. I know there is a bit of a connection there, but I couldn’t resist it.

Those who follow me will realise that this was written entirely tongue-in-cheek!

But, does anyone have any strong opinions on the suitability of treating this subject with humour?

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Dear diary.

Goodness me, it’s been a busy day. So much has been happening that I might almost forget who I am! Perhaps I need to remind myself; my name is Elizabeth Wilson, and I’m ten years old. Well, ten and three quarters, really. Very nearly eleven. Anyway, we had the careers teacher talking to us in our class, today. It’s never too early, she said.

So, we talked about careers. Well, in these enlightened times, we’re now being told: ‘Delay marriage until you’re sixteen, and get a career.’ Quite a turn around, eh? Sixteen! I’m sure I don’t know what my mum is going to say. I mean, a career is all well and good, but while I’m out being a career girl, she’ll be at home and all broody for grandchildren and worried that she’s heading towards her thirties and in the meantime all her friends will be cooing over their grandchildren.

I say that I don’t know what Mum is going to say, but that’s not actually true. I can hear her now; ‘It’s not natural, all this waiting. It’s a woman’s duty to have children – it’s her function, after all, both biologically and socially. What would happen if all you girls said you were off to have careers, rather than getting married and having children? Society would collapse, that’s what would happen. It would just consist of old people, and who would look after them?’

Plus, of course, I don’t want to leave it for too long; my biological clock is ticking and I’m not getting any younger.

But on the other hand, I could be in a responsible, well-paid post by the time I’m sixteen. Really, a whole world of experience is going to be opening up for my generation that my Mum could only dream about. In a way, it is no less than the final emancipation of women, and how exciting is that?

It was so much more than just a talk about careers, though. It has helped me to understand that there is more to life than just getting married and pleasing a husband. Just because I will be a woman, doesn’t mean that I am not an individual in my own right. We dare to say that the days of being owned by men, of being their mere playthings, are well and truly over!

And, I’ve got an interview already! The Mayor needs a new mistress; it’s only a two year contract, but it will be good experience and could perhaps be a stepping stone to something better. He’s big and fat, but rich as Croesus, and apparently he’s very good in bed, which is a bit of a bonus.

Perhaps, in a way, it’s a bit of a compromise. I’m sure that my parents will be pleased.

45 thoughts on “Comments, anyone?”

    1. Indeed, Tony. Hopefully, most readers would appreciate it’s a way to make a comment, using irony and humour. But there are always some around who are keen to take offence if they possibly can. Fortunately, most readers here will understand.

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  11. I enjoyed reading that for second time. I think you have the ability to write as a female…insofar as you did a good job with it in your book. Its a fun read ( your blog) and the child brides ( tongue in cheek, I hope) was rather apt. India is a wonderfully developing country but there are huge swathes of it which seem stuck in the dark ages.

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    1. Definitely tongue in cheek. Yes, the point about the sexually aware 11 year old – which reads as ridiculous – is just to make the point about child brides. And yes, there is still a long way to go.

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      1. In your book the narrator was a child bride. Very much so. But her resignation at being one is eclipsed at her acceptance of this and the way she sees life. It seemed very authentic. A sort of ” that’s all I can expect”… hopefully her two daughters will achieve more in the sequel (??)
        But is did make me smile so thank you again

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        1. Ooh, that sequel again…I don’t know that I’ll ever be able to write a true sequel to ‘Making Friends’, since I have a more limited experience of moving in modern Indian circles. Hence the current work in progress being set a little further back still – 1988, probably, and in the rather more old fashioned setting of an Indian Hill Station. I’m sure I’ll make a few points on the way, of course.

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          1. Hill Station, now you have my interest! Yes, I know I am nagging for that sequel but it begs to be written. PS Went to Literary Supper Party on Wednesday. 3 Guest Writers. Two were brilliant and one, who used to be brilliant ( although not my taste) gave a good example of ” how not to have a drink or six before reading from your book!”. Shame really.

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      1. In India girls used to be married off at the age of 9 or 10 with men who were 10 -15 years older to them, (sometimes even older) during the colonial times. Later the system was banned as colonial reforms took place. Nowadays it is not much heard of. That’s what made me wonder if the practice of child marriage still prevails, and to what extent.

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