Attention! Fantastic News!

On By Mick CanningIn comment, humour, satire, time

Now, this is good news.

Really good news.

Like so many people, I’ve always complained that there are just not enough hours in the day for me to get everything done that I want to do.

Heck, I don’t even have enough hours to do those things that I need to do.

This didn’t used to be the case, though. I can remember when my day used to glide past nice and smoothly; when I would have time to get up, eat breakfast, go to work, come home, eat and do whatever I needed to do, then maybe go out in the evening, come home again, and that was it! Job done! Time for everything!

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As I became older, though, there did seem to be less time available. Jobs lined up waiting to be done; I seemed to be busier and busier, and the days just seemed…shorter.

I began to wonder where the time was going. I looked in all the usual places; down the back of the sofa, under the bed, behind the stacks of baked beans in the bottom of the corner cupboard beside the sink, but no luck.

But I’ve been looking at it completely the wrong way.

So, the good news? Well, it took a lot of doing, but I have managed to fit a whole hour into just forty minutes.

Now, the consequences of this are pretty devastating, really.

I now have thirty six hours in my day instead of just twenty four.

There is just so much more I can do, now!

I can go to work for eight hours and still have twenty eight left over for other things.

Twenty eight!

Hell, that’s more than I used to have in a whole day, anyway!

I can even get have twelve hours sleep of a night, and then get a full days work in the next day.

And have sixteen hours left for other purposes. I guess I am now time-rich, to use one of these ridiculous modern phrases.

But…it’s odd, though. Despite all this extra time at my disposal, I seem to have more trouble than usual fitting a couple of simple tasks into an hour. Jobs that used to take me an hour, now seem to take an hour and a half to do. It is, as I say, rather odd.

And another downside of this, I suppose, is that I will no longer have an excuse to go offline for a while ‘just to catch up with things’.

Perhaps I’ll stick with the sixty minute hours for the moment, and keep the others in reserve for when I’m really busy.

‘Mick…’

‘Not now, Bob, I’m busy. I’ll get back to you later. You know, there just aren’t enough days in the week…’

30 thoughts on “Attention! Fantastic News!”

          1. My fiction track record is one published novel, but it was only released in NZ and Australia, i.e. nowhere in the eyes of the world. Though the publisher did tell me it just missed out on UK release. It was set in New Zealand circa 1912 (saved on research, because the background came from my grandmother’s tales of the times) and was about what most fiction is about: status, sex, and bloodshed. Along with the struggle to be both yourself and part of your community. I still have the flash black leather coat I bought with the proceeds.

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      1. Precisely! It’s getting more complicated in name of time saving or technology! Look at how many passwords we have to remember today…and different platforms have different password guidelines!

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        1. Indeed they do. And its all rather a minefield, too. The only way I feel I can ever get a break from all this technology nonsense is by going away fro a while – no phone, no email, walking in the hills, or somewhere else away from ‘civilisation’. *sigh*

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  7. I’ve had really productive hours when I got an hour and a half’s worth of work done, but I usually end up paying for it by having to take it easy for an hour and a half rather than an hour. So unless we can slow down the speed of light and enjoy the relativity gains thereof, I think we’re stuck.

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  8. Good thinking and it would give you more hours to do things but making arrangements and booking flights might be fraught with difficulty. Perhaps you just need your own time in your house when alone and convert to local time when leaving. Might work.Not.

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