Panicking Pigeons and Floundering Pheasants

Some birds look particularly elegant and graceful when they fly…

And some don’t…

Panicking pigeons are pitiful things,

Flapping and slapping and clapping their wings,

Each one has only one thing on its brain,

And that’s searching for insects, for seeds, and for grain.


Walk-bobbing-walking like chickens on speed,

Or speeded up clockwork or on some doped seed,

Cooing down chimneys and shitting on folks,

A ridiculous call like a ghost being choked.


A floundering pheasant’s a physical freak,

With a whirring of wings and a creak from its beak,

You would think they would hide up and shut up all day,

But a clattering rusty noise gives them away.


There are plenty of elegant fowl in the sky,

The swift and the swallow, the eagle and kite,

With a breath-taking swoop or a beautiful song,

At times, though, evolution just got it plain wrong.


And on the subject of birds, I couldn’t let you go without letting you listen to the blackbird in our garden who I mentioned in the previous post, who has been singing his little heart out every day:

30 thoughts on “Panicking Pigeons and Floundering Pheasants

  1. I really enjoyed the poem. It’s not only amusing, it’s got a nice lilt. And who doesn’t like birdsong? The only time I haven’t enjoyed it was the year the mockingbird decided to sing in the middle of the night: night after night after…

    Liked by 2 people

      1. Actually, it’s quite beautiful, and interesting. The mockingbird ‘mocks’ other birds by repeating their song, and they’re fabulous mimics. I can’t remember exactly how many songs they’ve got in their repertoire, but it’s a lot. I once had one in my neighborhood that could mimic a mallard duck’s quacking.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Cool poem, Mick! We have a variety of birds that come to feed every day, including a pair of pigeons so fat that they can barely even walk without waddling! We also have a pair of gorgeous red cardinals and a common grackle, a bird much more beautiful than its name … sleek, shiny black with a bright blue shiny head! Enjoy your bird friends … they’re much more relaxing than watching humans.

    Liked by 1 person

          1. We have pitch and putt too. Not quite the same. For us, pitch and put is a real golf course, but the holes are only 60-80 yards long. Miniature golf is strictly putting around obstacles. It’s been years since I’ve done either – haven’t done miniature since I was a kid, outside of a video game.

            I suppose if I had a burning desire to take up poetry I might be able to make something of it, but frankly most poetry doesn’t excite or inspire me. I’m merely at the throw out the occasional stanza just for grins level. (Unlike some folks who write books full of the stuff 😉 )

            Liked by 1 person

  3. I recorded a bird that I assumed was a blackbird about 3 years ago and I tried to match the sound but couldn’t get a 100% match with any singing bird. Whatever it was, this bird sang really loud. It sounds just like your bird, so turns out it WAS a blackbird. This bird used to set up home singing outside my window every year for 3 or 4 years. But this year it’s not here, which is a bit sad…

    Liked by 1 person

  4. btw pigeons might not be the most graceful flyers, but as far as I know they’re one of the fastest birds, if you measure by cruising speed rather than top speed. They can average 60mph/100kph for hours at a time which is pretty impressive. Hell’s Angels spend great deals of money on their bikes and I bet they can’t beat 600 miles in 10 hours! And I bet they can’t refuel on millet sprays or mealworms, either!!

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.