Photographs

I’ve become very bad at taking photographs. Not exactly lazy, it’s more that my focus is on the world around me. More and more now I find that when I’m out for a walk all my senses are tuned into the world around me – sounds, sights, smells – and I feel I just want to take them all in, rather than try to record them. I just want to be in the moment.

And, incidentally, a photograph is a poor substitute. It can never capture a complete experience – the colour is frequently leached out by bright sunshine, I cannot hear the wind in the trees, or smell the scents of autumn. I cannot feel the nip of the sharp early morning air. The sounds surrounding me would all be lost. The leaves suddenly whirling all around me in the breeze. I would lose the deceptive simplicity and is-ness of all this.

And yet, I enjoy photographs. I use them a lot in my writing. How to square the circle? Must I only take photographs on days I set out to focus on photography? They are good memory joggers. You may not get the sounds or scents (or sharp nips), but a photo may well remind you of them. And they can be things of beauty on their own, of course.

I think I need to find a way of taking photographs without disturbing whatever is my current train of thought at the time. A sort of Zen-like process.

Found – One Muse

‘Oh, you’re back.’

‘Well, not really. I’ve been here all the time. I just didn’t have anything to say to you, that’s all.’

‘Why on earth not?’

‘For a start, you don’t listen to me. You keep fannying around with that novel that your heart’s not in, anyway. What is it that you actually want to write? Not that one, at least at the moment.’

‘I’d love to finish it, actually, just get it out of the way.’

‘It’ll still be there when you’re ready to finish it – if you ever are. And if you’re not, it doesn’t matter. Surely you’ve got other stuff you’d rather be working on?’

‘I…’

‘Like, your poetry’s pretty crap, but you enjoy writing it.’

‘Hey! I…’

‘Then there’s the other novel, the one you’ve been faffing around with for years.’

‘Yes…’

‘So work on that one, since you actually do like it, and do a few paintings, for God’s sake. You’ve been saying you’re going to, well get on with it.’

‘I thought a muse was meant to be an inspiration, not a nag.’

‘A muse,’ she replied tersely, ‘will say whatever she thinks necessary to get her author off his lazy butt! Now, what about this pamphlet or brochure you’re meant to be doing at the moment?’

‘The zine?’

She visibly cringed.

‘Yes…that. As far as I can see you’ve been tinkering with it for months but you’ve nothing to show for it.’

‘I…’

‘You seem to have decided on a few of the poems you want to put in it, and a short story, but you haven’t rewritten the essays you wanted to use, haven’t sorted out the photographs and done nothing towards the artwork. You’ve not even decided on a title for the thing yet!’

‘I’ve…’

‘Yes, and that’s another thing. You keep jumping from one thing to another, and never completing anything.’

‘I’ve always thought it’s good to have a couple of projects on the go. When I get stuck on one I can go and work on another.’

‘Yeeessss….a couple you say. Exactly how many have you got on the go at the moment?’

‘Ah, er, I’m not sure…’

‘No? Well roughly how many?’

‘Er…’

‘Very roughly? You don’t actually know, do you? Just finish something! What about the short poem’ -*cringe* – ‘zine you’ve got in bits? As far as I can tell it’s nearer completion than the other one.’

‘Um, I suppose I could…’

‘And I’m not some lifestyle guru, but get out and go for more walks. And listen to more music and read some more books. You’re not reading very much at the moment, are you? And read something you want to read and listen to something you want to listen to. Not because you think you ‘ought’ to, whatever the hell that means. And stay off fricking social media, too. It’s poisonous.’

‘That’s certainly true.’

‘So just see that you do, or I really will be off. I’ll be checking up on you more regularly, now. I can see it’s the only way.’

She’s a tough, unforgiving, so-and-so, my muse.

Venice – 2

I put a few photos of Venice up on here a long time ago. Today I fancied putting up a few more. We’ve been to Venice just the once, and really enjoyed it. We saw it in the sun and in the rain. Both were beautiful. We should probably go again before it sinks.

There are a lot of large houses of this type!

The ubiquitous gondolas.

Arab statue on a street corner.

The Grand Canal

Chiesa del Santissimo Redentore

Hope your day is a good day.

A Bit of Digging

Well, they arrived yesterday.

I have finally got my family history book formatted and printed, and I reckon it looks quite decent. So all I need to do now is to get it posted out to family members.

While researching all this, I naturally made a lot of discoveries. Some were certainly more unexpected than others, though. From previous research my father had done, we already suspected that my great grandfather had changed his name, possibly on a whim, from Prater to Canning. I was able to confirm this by, amongst other things, a comparison of various dates of birth in his family. This immediately removes the possibility of my searching back to see whether my name has any noble / famous / important roots. This is something that matters a lot to some people, although obviously only along the male line, which is why it seems to matter much more to men.

Although I turned it up too recently for the book, I have learned details about my father’s life in WWII which I would otherwise never have come to know. I had no idea – and seemingly nor had anyone else in the family – that from 1940 until joining the regular army in 1943 and being posted to India and Burma, he had been part of what had been dubbed ‘Churchill’s Secret Army’, soldiers trained to operate behind enemy lines in the event of a German invasion of Britain. Fulfilling the same role as the French Resistance, they would have carried out acts of sabotage and hit-and-run attacks to slow the enemy advance. it was only after that threat had receded that he joined the ‘Regulars’.

And then, less unexpectedly, there were the stories of extreme hardship: the early deaths, the poverty, the workhouse, tuberculosis and pleurisy…

Of course, if it was possible to search back far enough, we would all find we had a common early human ancestor, which gives the lie to the importance of race.

Does any of this research really matter? Well, in some ways, no. Does it sound crazy if I say that despite all my work, it does not matter that much to me? I’m very much in two minds over this. A lot of this felt more like an intellectual exercise than a personal quest. It was interesting to find out where my great grandparents and their parents had lived, for this felt just close enough to be a part of me. But before them? And especially when I could discover nothing more than their names and some vague dates? No, not really. Throughout this project I have been especially keen to be able to put names to old photographs, for this seemed the only way to make these people come alive again, or at least begin to. That I’ve been able to positively identify some of them feels more satisfying than pushing a line back another hundred years, although I do have nearly every branch back at least to the 1700’s, but in every case it is the stories I’ve found out about these people that matter.

But back to my question. Does any of this research matter? I do think it has the potential to bring us a little closer to our families by emphasising our shared history, and I’ve greatly enjoyed long discussions with cousins about our various researches and discoveries. But beyond that? Well, I’ve enjoyed learning the social history involved with my family, the realities of how people actually lived in the towns and countryside over the last few hundred years. And as well as emphasising my connection to my extended family it has also, as I wrote a few month ago, given me a greater sense of connection to the land where I live.

I have enjoyed exploring the past, but I’m not going to live there.

Happy New Year!

Chinese New Year, that is. The year of the Ox. Here are a few pictures I’ve taken of Chinese New Year celebrations in the past. With Lockdown, I don’t suppose there’ll be too many going on this year, at least outside of China.

First of all, some from London about thirty years ago:

Chinese New Year 2013 in Kolkata:

And a couple of my own paintings:

Gong Xi Fa Cai!

David Nash and Impermanence

A few days ago we went to the Towner Gallery in Eastbourne, Sussex, specifically to see the Eric Ravilious paintings and prints on permanent exhibition there. There was also a large exhibition by the sculptor David Nash, who works with wood on a large scale. The fact that the whole exhibition, which also included a gallery of paintings, prints and a couple of small installations, and was intended to highlight the effects of the Climate Crisis, was the first one ever curated by Caroline Lucas M.P. of the Green Party was an added bonus for me.

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As much as I enjoyed the Ravilious, I was blown away by Nash’s sculptures. To see wooden sculptures on that scale is unusual in itself – usually that would be the preserve of stone or metal – but that very scale plays tricks with the mind and the eye. Boxes and bowls many times larger than one would expect meet the eye as you walk around the galleries, and many of the pieces also deceive where perhaps one looks to be made from several separate pieces of wood, but on closer inspection are carved from a single block like the boat shapes in the top picture, or the ‘stack’ in the one below that.

Much of the work is left rough-hewn, but even this can be deceptive. Some pieces have been carefully finished to give that appearance.

Sculpture is the art form that seems to exist to interact with the natural world. A number of the works here are based on natural forms, but there are also stories of projects Nash has undertaken where his sculpture is either living, in the form of carefully planted and managed groves of trees, or interact in other ways.

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‘Boulder’ is one such project. One of the first large-scale pieces Nash made was to cut a boulder-shaped chunk from a tree (illustrated at the top of Nash’s charcoal drawing above) in 1978. This was then transported to a stream near to where he lives and works, in the Welsh hills, and rolled into the water. Since then, it has slowly made its way downstream until it reached the estuaries and inlets of the sea, where it finally disappeared in 2015. Nash documented its travels in a series of photographs and films made regularly all the while, and presented in the exhibition as a film.

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Nash’s sketch of a Larch trunk

It feels as though there is something of this meeting of art and the natural world in old ruins overrun with scrub and grass. They frequently seem to have a sculptural quality that complements the landscape around them, in a way that more pristine buildings do not.

And I like the sense that an artwork, like a ruined building, is not permanent and that eventually the natural world will absorb it back into itself. That it will reclaim it. Perhaps the artist and the environmentalist in me merge here.

My own sculptures are in wood, and some of them are set out in our garden where they gradually degrade over the years through the action of sun and rain, until they appear strangely like some weird plants that have sprouted unexpectedly there.

An Abundance of Greyness

It is a grey, overcast, cool and drizzly August day, and I am feeling particularly flat and uninspired, and disinclined to human company. So in the absence of mountains, what else would I rather do than go for a walk in the woods?

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Taking black and white photographs to reflect my mood, naturally…

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Loving the Oak trees that seem to somehow look as awkward and as out of sorts as I feel…

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Relishing the lushness of the plants that still seem comparatively fresh…

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The fantastic shapes of old wood…

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The roots that look as though they might attempt to encircle the earth like Yggdrasil, the mighty tree of Norse legend…

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The paths…

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And the umbels.

 

Very Random Sri Lanka!

Finally, it’s warm and sunny here! Hooray!

So here are a few random pictures I took in Sri Lanka some while ago. So what relevance is there in that? None, really…

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I just like the randomness of them.

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Lurking Kingfisher…

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That, incidentally, is a Cannon Ball Tree.

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And that’s why.

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And I have no idea what that tree is called, but the strange roots are little more than a hand-breadth wide, and as tall as I am.

Just Playing…

Take one photograph, play around with it a little, create 3 new ones, all different.

Add some autumn haiku, since it’s almost spring.

That was fun.

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Yellow maple leaves

Rattling wildly in the wind –

Autumn’s prayer flags

 

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Obsession with time

Is climbing trees in autumn

To get down the leaves.

 

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The last yellow leaf

Hovers above the brambles

Waiting for the wind.

The Beastie From The Eastie

Yes, we’ve had some snow.

And oddly, despite this being the UK, lots of things are still working.

Although, to glance at the newspapers you could be forgiven for thinking the End Of The World was here.

But the sun was out this morning, so I wandered out for a bit of a bimble in the countryside.

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Fresh snow always feels magical.

I suppose this is because it is a pure white, because it sparkles in the sun and even in the night time it appears to glow.

It covers things up, but sits lightly upon them.

There is a purity to fresh snow that causes the landscape to feel cleaner and purer, too.

While the snow is falling, sound seems to be muffled and absorbed, so that one exists in a silent wonderland.

Shadows

It transforms a dull winter landscape into something bright and very special.

some paths are still clear

Some of the paths are still easy to find,

Some paths are less obvious

While others have become less obvious.

tracks

The animals have their own paths, that we are often unable to tread.

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But there is a silence over everything, and every now and again a breath of wind sends a thousand sparkling snow diamonds drifting down through the branches of the trees.

some things are hidden

The snow hides much…

Footprints

But it reveals where we have been.

Some shapes become more mysterious

And it makes some shapes more mysterious.